


Flowers bloom in different shapes

by Gedankentaenzer



Category: Mulan (1998)
Genre: Gender Identity, Genderqueer Character, Identity, Nonbinary Character, genderqueer mulan, mulan - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-24
Updated: 2019-07-24
Packaged: 2020-07-19 02:47:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 697
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19966768
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gedankentaenzer/pseuds/Gedankentaenzer
Summary: Mulan didn't go to the army, because she thought she was a boy.But she discovered that she liked being a boy.She also liked being a girl.Mulan liked being both.





	Flowers bloom in different shapes

Mulan didn't go to the army, because she felt like a boy. She did it to protect her father and in the long run her country. It wasn't that she had tried to run away from her responsibilities but instead she had taken a chance. She couldn't be the perfect daughter, but she could help in other ways. She had wanted to be a good daughter. She had tried to comply to the expectations, but somehow she wasn't meant for that. It had made her sad to disappoint her family, but she hadn't felt wrong.  
There were many reasons she went to the army, but that she felt like a boy was not one. Neither to improve her worth.  
She took the sword and army to protect others, not to prove herself. Or himself.  
Then although she didn't go to the army, because she felt like a boy, while she was in the army she had learned to like being a boy. She had felt comfortable. There was still some disgust left for some living situations some men practiced, but there were also living situations of women that she couldn't understand. Mulan didn't hate being a girl. There were times she liked it. Times she would wear dresses and jewelry with joy. There were also times were she rather preferred being a he. It changed. It was fluid. She accepted it.  
And Shang did also. Although he maybe didn't understand it wholely, he accepted it and supported Mulan.  
It didn't pose a problem for his romantic affections towards her either. Since he had fallen in love with Ping first, how he later confessed. And he had wholeheartedly believed Ping to be a boy. It didn't come as a surprise to Mulan. He had suspected that already. After he had proven himself to be a warrior, there had been times he had caught Shang looking at him in certain ways. He had been pleased with that somehow, knowing that he could earn affection in that 'form'. Actually for the first time ever. It had done something incredible to his confidence. But it also hadn't been important at that time. There had been a war, which usually was way more urgent.  
And although Shang had felt betrayed as he found out she had deceived him - although after the first few days it hadn't felt like deceiving anymore -, she had managed to earn his trust again. And he still liked her as a woman. She once asked him why. And to some part, it was certainly her personality since that didn't change much. But he had been honest to say, that he found both women and men to his liking. And Mulan just had charmed him either way.  
It was a delightful attitude and she loved him for that. It was also a relief that her newfound identity was no problem. She couldn't have stayed with him if it was.  
But now they were married, even if the way had held a lot of obstacles. And she was happy because Shang was the best husband she could have asked for.  
And she didn't mind being a wife. Being a man was great, sometimes it was just a mood, sometimes it was something deeper. But overall she had a tendency to be a woman or rather nothing specified. Sometimes she just couldn't stand it and became a he. Shang adapted to it easily. There were strange looks from time to time, whispered gossip in the streets. They both didn't mind. They were happy and glad they could be open with each other. And they were also war heroes, so they let them be.  
Once before all that had started she had asked herself when her reflection would show who she was inside.  
Now Mulan knew.  
It wasn't as easy as that. Her insides could be represented in many different ways. Like the river, she once asked herself that question in front of, the surface changed. It wasn't quiet. Weather and seasons and the beings inside shaped the form. And Mulan's shape was formed new every day. And although the reflection varied more than ever, it was also more than ever Mulan.

**Author's Note:**

> A take on Mulan's gender identity.  
> I rediscovered this in my drafts and decided that I really like it, especially since I'm trying to figure out my own gender identity at the moment. Very helpful to project your own issues onto fictional characters^^  
> I also just really love Mulan, it's probably my favourite Disney movie.  
> It would be really nice if you would like to share your opinion on this and apart from that I hope you enjoyed this little oneshot.  
> Since English isn't my first language if you find any errors (especially ones that cause problems for understanding) point them out to me.  
> Thank you for reading^^
> 
> Gedankentaenzer


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